11.04.2015

Little Cups of Jello.


I feel the need to burn all my bras! I've spent hundreds and hundreds of dollars on bras from sizes 40F to a 32C. I've dropped 100+ bucks on a single bra in hopes that it would make me feel more comfortable with my breasts. 


I started to develop breasts in the 4th grade, I remember very clearly the day I was made fun of for not wearing a bra. I was pissed I had to wear one, growing boobs was embarrassing and I hated that I had more than most of the girls in my class. I enjoyed sports up until my boobs were too big and I was embarrassed to run with them bouncing everywhere. 


For most of my life I felt like people saw my breasts before they saw me - there was no hiding them. I had to limit the clothing I could wear, I had to shop in special places to find bras that fit me.


When I finally decided to try to lose weight for my wedding I thought it would solve my problems.


I lost 50 pounds, but unfortunately you can't pick where that weight will come off of and I still had to spend an outrageous amount on a corset from a specialty store to hold them up in my dress. 


They weren't all bad, they served me well while breastfeeding my children, which I am thankful for! It's a wonder no children suffocated during it though - shoot I thought I would suffocate when I laid down with those huge boobs on me. 


Over the years as I've lost more and more weight my breasts have shrunken, which makes me happy, but no less uncomfortable with them. They are like little cups of jello - moving and spilling out of every opening in my bras. I literally have my hands in my bras 37 times a day adjusting. I'm constantly looking down at them to see if they are where they should be. 

I've always said when I was done having babies I would get them fixed and I did start seriously saving my pennies after I had Aiden. We had a few setbacks, but finally the time has come and I'm getting them this Friday!! At first I was hesitant to share my excitement for them, it seemed a little shallow of me, but then I got to thinking about how much agony and grief I've felt over these stupid breasts over the years. 


I felt unsure how to talk about it with Madison, she's old enough to know what's going on and while I don't want to hide anything from her I wanted to talk about it in a way she would understand. I felt a tad guilty that I couldn't be happy with my body the way it was, but you know what? I've done my work on my body, I've showed her how important it is to take care of yourself. I've showed her that I can be happy at any size and my breasts are just something that I can't fix with diet and exercise. 

I've been waiting for this for years and I'm excited to have boobs I like in a nice normal size. Ones I don't have to shove back in my bra. Ones that don't hit the counter when I bend over. 

34 comments :

  1. You have earned this. May your recovery be speedy!

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  2. There are some fantastic organizations that you can donate your old bra's to. There is one that gives them to women who have been rescued from sex trafficking. There is another one that gives them to shelters and charities. Check out Bras for a Cause and Free the Girls.

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  3. So excited for you! I am hoping one day I will be able to do the same. Right now I'm just struggling with the cost of bras and then the damn little wires coming out! JEEZ! :)

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  4. Yeah I was going to second that you should donate those old bras! Our homeless ministry at church always needs bras and underwear (most people don't think to donate them!).

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  5. Good for you!!!!! I will be fixing mine once I know for sure I'm done with kids and I will probably get a tummy tuck for my c-section pouch. Maybe not though I am working at that one! I kind of got into it with my father in law about it but here is what I had to say(mind you my FIL is a great guy). My thought is no on ever questions you when you decide to remodel your home or re land scape your yard or add a spoiler to your car why do people care so much when you decide to fix your body?!?!?!?! It is the one thing that you will always have so why not make it the best for what YOU want! Sorry for my ramble but I say good for you and I wish you luck!!! ❤️ Annie

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  6. I'm beyond excited for you!! Good luck xoxo

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  7. Good for you!! I had a reduction/lift six years ago next week and I have never regretted it!! I feel sooooo much better now and feel like I look "normal" and people actually look at my face first instead of my boobs! My scarring bad been minimal even after a few minor complications and there are only a couple of bras I can wear (I'm shaped differently on the sides because my doctor lipo-ed my sides) but I don't even care!! I feel sooooo much better!!

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  8. So excited for you! I had a reduction more than 10 years ago now and I swear it was the best thing I have ever done for myself. I'll never understand why anyone would think this type of procedure is vain. I've had a few friends who have it done too and I've never heard any complaints. I LOVE MY BOOBS! Recovery was easy peasy too. I had the surgery on a Monday and was back at work on Thursday. You got this!

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  9. Definitely check out Free the Girls! It's such a wonderful organization that allows women rescued from sex trafficking to open their own business, which earns them 3x the average daily wage. Empowering women escaping sex trafficking AND you get a cleaned out bra drawer? win win!

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  10. You have worked so hard, you should 100% feel excited for whats to come! congrats to you, good luck & prayers to you all & the medical staff caring for you! speedy recovery!

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  11. You deserve it and you are an inspiration of what hard work and determination can accomplish!!

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  12. That's so exciting! There's only so much diet and exercise can help, like you said. I've always had large breasts as well and now that I've lost weight and nursed two babies, one for 2 years, they have basically deflated! I think you know what to tell Madison. Just have open communication and answer her questions has honestly as you can. She sees how hard you work and how heathy you guys are as a family. You've got this mama! Hoping for a speedy recovery

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  13. That's so exciting! There's only so much diet and exercise can help, like you said. I've always had large breasts as well and now that I've lost weight and nursed two babies, one for 2 years, they have basically deflated! I think you know what to tell Madison. Just have open communication and answer her questions has honestly as you can. She sees how hard you work and how heathy you guys are as a family. You've got this mama! Hoping for a speedy recovery

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  14. Be excited! !!! You have worked hard and it's ok to do stuff for yourself. The pain will be so worth the end result. Yea for new boobs! !!!

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  15. GIRRRRRLLLLL!!!!! Share your excitement! Breasts are a big deal and as hard as you've worked losing weight and birthing 2 of the most precious children on the planet. You've earned them!

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  16. I love how honest you are about it! It's a thing to boast!

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  17. I am so happy for you! You have worked so hard on your body over the years and now you get to reward yourself with a surgery like this. I think it will make you feel 10x better than you already feel!

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  18. almost my exact story. People wonder why I have 1 swim suit? Well because it took hours to pick out my mom still had to modify it and I still have to stuff and tuck my saggy boobs in it. Good luck! I will be doing the same when I have my last baby!

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  19. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited for you!!!!!! I'm totally looking forward to getting rid of my 36H backbreakers!!!!!!! Small C here I come! Go girl!

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  20. YAY! I can't wait to hear what you think about it. I have and have always had huge knockers so I totally get the discomfort and embarrassment. I hope this surgery is everything you've dreamed it would be :)

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  21. You've earned them! Good luck and heal quickly with everything! My friend got implants because she was so small on top for her curvy, very tall frame and she was always so concerned about not being balanced. She looks fantastic and never looked back. I can only imagine you being the same, just going in a different direction. I developed in about 4th grade too. I remember once in 5th grade being made fun of my bra (it was a sports bra - tried to smash the girls as much as possible!) that had blue dots on it. My shirt, borrowed from my cousin after an emergency surgery for my dad that kept us away from home, showed the blue dots through them. I remember the day my so-called friends made fun of me. I feel your pain. Good luck!! Can't wait to see how you feel afterwards!

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  22. So excited & happy for you! Thank you for sharing your journey & family!

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  23. I am so happy for you. You have worked so hard to get where you are at, I'm proud of you and I hope to be fit one day as well! God bless!

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  24. I am so happy for you. You have worked so hard to get where you are at, I'm proud of you and I hope to be fit one day as well! God bless!

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  25. Hope it all goes well. Too bad you couldn't have shared with those of us that got hardly any lol

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  26. I say HOORAY for you! I am so proud of you for making this decision. You are such an inspirational woman and an even more amazing mom. I literally think of YOU when I address body image issues with my 8 year old daughter. "how would Skinny Meg handle this?" I support you 100% and think you are making the BEST possible decision. I agree that being open and honest with TS is the best policy and I think she is a mature little girl that will understand. I will be sending you all my positive thoughts and prayers :)

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  27. Good luck. I know exactly what your talking about! I breastfed 6 babies and had implants to fill them back up! You deserve this! Wishing you a speedy recovery. Take it EASY.

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  28. Girl....I feel ya on the boobs! I got mine in 3rd Grade and would hang my bra in my locker because I didn't want to wear one! And NEVER being able to fit into prom dresses or anything! I can't wait to "see" them! hahaha (is that creepy?)

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  29. good for you! when i was 13 and looking for a bat mitzvah dress i'll never forget the salesladies saying i was built like a 16 year old. that's great but not when you're 13!
    b

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  30. This is my fantasy.. I have never had "good ones" only big ones which people think are good.. But When mine shot out about 3rd and 4 th grade, I didn't get the proper foundation garmets and what kid in Jr High wants a 4 hook nasty cross my heart?? So they have always been saggy and I have never birthed no babies. I have considered getting them replaced even before I lose weight because it is such a self esteem issue internally. So I am happy for you and I can't wait to see how it works out... I will be holding out for that day I get mine redone and right there with ya sister!

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  31. No man would ever even *consider* feeling guilty if he had to fix his business because diet and exercise couldn't take it to that last step of the way, so don't you go thinking about it! Boobs are such a confidence area for a woman, and you exude confidence, so you deserve to feel it in every ounce of your being. Congrats! (Oh and p.s. - my mom got hers redone when I was in 2nd grade due to similar issues, and I never thought twice about it. She explained to me she had something wrong with her body she had to get fixed because when you get older and have babies, your body changes, and that when I was a mommy, mine would change too. Sometimes you can fix it yourself, but sometimes you can't, so you have to take medicine or have therapy or surgery or other things like that. And the older I got, the more I understood it. Never even a question! Transparency was always best with us, and you two seem exactly like us, but I'm sure you'll work it out!)

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  32. You have worked so very hard to be where you are today - in every aspect of your life. You deserve to be happy and getting your boobs fixed the way you want them is all part of it. All of us women know exactly how you feel - weight changes, children, and life puts a hurting on some things that diet and exercise cannot change. And, you have worked hard to make the money and do what you want with it!! You go girl, and I cannot wait to see you looking even more fabulous than you always do!! You are wonderful, amazing, keep it up!! Speedy recovery and love and hugs xoxoxoxo

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  33. Out of curiosity how did you explain it to Madison? We want one more baby and then I want to get mine done as well. But I'm really worried about how I'll explain it to my kids, especially my girls. Because by the time we get around to having another baby another 2-3 years will have gone by. Making my oldest daughter 8 or 9 years old.

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