Falling off the wagon.

I have a little secret. 
I've been taking a nap with Miss M almost everyday. 

Who wouldn't want to snuggle with that?
School starts in less than a month and I'm going to be sorry when I'm trying not to fall asleep in finance class!

In sad news, my favorite water bottle has turned up missing.

This is the last known picture of it {thanks to Miss M}. I've had to take regular 16 oz bottle to the gym, which sucks because I have to refill it about a million times.  I have a hard time drinking plain water through out the day, but when I sweat I drink it like it's going out of style. 

I went to the Dr. yesterday, I had to drag the kid along, all of my baby-sitters fell through.  She was good, except for trying to talk over me when I was talking to the Dr.  I swear she thinks everything is competition! I have NO IDEA where she gets that from :)

***on a side note: those of you with kids, when do they grow out of the tattletale phase?? I'm tired of being told on ALL. THE. TIME.  Seriously, shut the lid!

So, the Dr. doesn't think my working out is affecting my cycles.  She didn't seem concerned at all about the fact that I was working out 2 hours a day.
In fact she was concerned that I was not ovulating, which is weird because my temps always show that I do, but she said those are not reliable?? 
She took some blood work to check my progesterone anyways, if I don't get knocked up this round I'll go back to make sure that I am indeed ovulating. 
Other than that they don't do much until you've been trying a year.
I still plan to stick with my one hour a day at the gym for this month and see if it has any effect.

I really missing running, I've done 5ish miles a couple times on the weekend, but I'm craving a nice 10 mile ass kicker.

Spin is a good alternative because it's so fast paced and actually can condition your legs to help you run faster.  I spin at least 4x a week and do an advanced step class on the other days.
My eating on the other hand has been atrocious!
I seriously fell off the wagon and hit every piece of chocolate on the way down.  The problem is I'm having a hard time caring.  My weight is the same, it's been the same for the last decade {or year, whatever} so I'm really struggling with depriving myself of what I want when I don't feel it makes a difference. 
On the other hand I'm not satisfied with how I look.  I'm not UNHAPPY, but I just don't feel 'done'. 
I'm hoping when school starts to get a little motivation from being back in a routine.  I think I may even do a 10 day cleanse to kick my sugar habit, which I swear is like crack to me.

One last thing, I saw the most offensive saying on some jerks truck the other day.

{JAK IT UP fat chicks can't jump}

Seriously.  I don't care if you are fat or skinny this is wrong on so many levels.  I'm wanted to roll down my window and give him a piece of my mind, but I had the kid in the back and you know you can't be yelling at random people out the car window when your kids are around :)
It still annoys me just seeing this picture.

Happy Tuesday!


  1. I'm sending lots of baby dust your way! Lots and lots and lots!

  2. My kids are definitely cutest when sleeping (& quiet.) Snoopy is going to be 6 and the random tattling gets better. They start telling people what you do for a living. (My my doesn't work-she's just A MOM.) And where you live. (While I pray no one comes and shanks us in our sleep.) I am sure this phase will end....someday.

    Damn food. I wish I had no sense of taste sometimes.

  3. I think the tattletale phase lasts a while!! My son is almost 6 and still doing it :/

    I LOVE my 24 oz water bottles! Aren't they awesome? I broke one a while back and was left with ONLY 1! That was not happening, I went out and bought another one that week. They aren't cheap or I'd have 7 of them!

  4. Love your blog...I've 100% neglected mine this summer...due mainly to the fact that I'm home with three crazy children and a nutzo husband all summer and finding time to blog is....not really happening. I live in rural eastern Washington and have encountered this awful sticker on more than one red neck truck. Super ick!!!!

  5. Which cleanse do you do? Your blog is amazing, I love reading it, and I too am a sugar addict! I'm really struggling with giving up sugar and would love a recommendation for a way to kick it!

  6. We are in the same boat for sure. Except I'm not ttc now or ever again. I'm not close to happy with my looks and I STILL eat shit. It's only been since Friday but it hasn't stopped. Sorry about the water bottle. I left mine at my sister in law's last Friday and just made my kids walk over to get it because I missed it so much. And that sticker! Not cool. Who puts that on their vehicle? Real mature.

  7. Hooray for Summer naps!!! Here's hoping you get knocked up this time :)

  8. I have been reading your blog for a little while, but haven't ever left a comment. You may want to have your dr check to see if you have PCOS (it can be done with blood work or an ultrasound). People with PCOS typicaly do not ovulate and this in turn makes there cycles out of whack...really short or really long. It can also make weight lose more difficult. You may not have it, but if they can do a quick test for it, it may save you a lot of extra months of trying if you are not ovulating. Good luck!

  9. Wow, I want to kill that truck driver! A**hole.

  10. I was just thinking about the other day. I'm sorry the baby journey is taking longer than expected. I will continue to think & pray happy baby thoughts for you!
    And hello! You always look like a Rock Star, so don't beat yourself up too badly woman! :)

  11. I'll be crossing my fingers for you and the baby making!!

  12. I am ready for a routine too! Keep up with good work! I will pray for your baby maker! :)

  13. Im bored with it. I've been working out so hard so long for so many days a week. Im just bored... Also I should mention I have severe ADD. I have gone from 195 to 149 & im starting to feel like my body is refusing any more weight loss. Did you experience this?

  14. Im bored with it. I've been working out so hard so long for so many days a week. Im just bored... Also I should mention I have severe ADD. I have gone from 195 to 149 & im starting to feel like my body is refusing any more weight loss. Did you experience this?

  15. Sending lots of hugs and love your way girl. I know how frustrating it is not to be able to get pregnant. Hopefully this month is the month for you!
    And totally take advantage of those nap times!

  16. Oh Megan, how I feel what you are saying. It's frustrating when you want to "go on" with life as you love it but are forced to make changes. Right now you just have to do what's best for your body during this season.

    With my darn surgeries then chemo my workouts have changed dramatically. I can't do 2 hours and the tough, kick my fanny class like spin I have to take at a slower pace. Frustrating for me to be in and out of the gym as I heal, but I'm always glad for the days when I skip back in, ready to move my tired body.

    Saw my oncologist before my chemo yesterday and we talked about my muscle loss. He's confident that will come back in time. I'm not so sure. He also stressed I am a good example for those that see me working out, my bald head wrapped in a bandana and fighting cancer. Sometimes our fight with and for our bodies isn't just about weight or size or health, it's about sanity.

    You are very brave to share your struggle and you never know who is reading your blog that you will be a tremendous inspiration to.

    big squeezy hug, Marla

  17. My son is 5 & tattle tells like it's going out of style. I hate it too but then I think with this sick world I want him to tell me if there is a bully at school or something awful.

    If you do a 10 day detox cleanse you'll have to blog about it. I am in the exact same, could tone & shred up a bit...not unhappy and yet not loving my physique. But unwilling to give up my troth sized fro yo portions in the 110 heat we're having here in Southern Cali

  18. I hate bumper stickers like that! On my way to work I always see this beat up Civic that has been "suped" up for racing. It has a sticker that says, " No fat chicks. Car will drag" if I was not 3 feet from the school I work in I would screech, a step beyond scream at him. Btw, the guy who drives said car is not exactly Hugh Jackman if you catch my drift. Absurd!


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